The title says it all… it’s a zany video all about fun with pork.
Well, that is, it says almost everything. It doesn’t prepare you for the pork-loving bunny bouncing around to the sprightly sounds of 7 Seconds of Love (their ska band) . In this animation, the bacons have eyeballs and the Pork Monster is hilariously disturbing.
Yes sirree. There’s no denying it. Bacon is the candy of all meats. So say we all!
At Amazon.com, you can find a whole page devoted to “bacon-meat-candy”. Better yet, the Bacon Freak Club has a line of “Bacon is Meat Candy” t-shirts, hats, tanks and other greasy apparel.
This is all good and well. But when it comes down to it,
bacon is the Hershey’s of “Meat Candy”.
Let’s face it. Bacon — like Hershey’s — is one of those good ‘ol reliable staples that can manage to pull you through the next craving. You go to the market, drop it into your cart (bacon that is — not the chocolate) and think about how well it will go with that burger, or maybe next to a stack of pancakes and eggs. (If you’re really inspired, you’ll think about how it will add rich depth to your next Puttanesca Sauce.)
But let’s face it. Sometimes (okay, most of the time),
Hershey’s just ain’t good enough.
Sometimes, you need a real chocolate to satisfy the craving. Something deep, dark… a luscious 75% Ecuadorian cocoa, or perhaps a spicy blend of chilies and cocoa nibs to tantalize the palate.
…and sometimes,
Bacon just ain’t good enough.
Sometimes, you need a more complex flavor to tantalize the palate. In these cases, I recommend a time-stopping indulgence in the sweet, salty flavors of a mouth-watering Spanish Serrano or Italian Prosciutto. And no, pork does not necessarily claim all of the top-shelf real-estate when it comes to meat candy indulgences. Enter: Bresaola. Trust me. You’ve gotta try it.
A Prost to the dandiest of all meat candies:
Serrano, Prosciutto, Bresaola.
Img src: TempestHole.com
That’s what Paulina said after she ingested about 3 weeks worth of calories at the Texas State Fair. At BigTex.com you can traverse the wide world of a Texan State Fair without even stepping foot near the big 10-gallon hat state. You’ll also immediately see why Paulina said what she said about her curvaceous rear end.
Of course, you’ll miss out on actually ingesting all the gut-wrenching deep-fried foods littered about the fair. But not to worry. With a quick click through to the Big Tex food locator, you too can at lease lust (or disgust) over foods saturated in way too much fat.
Chicken Fried Bacon – Thick and peppery Farm Pac® bacon is seasoned, double-dipped in a special batter and breading and deep-fried. Served with a creamy side of ranch or honey mustard sauce. Served at N30 located on Nimitz at MLK. Winner of Best Taste in the Big Tex Choice Awards competition.
Fried Banana Split – A mixture of banana and honey peanut butter is rolled in balls, battered and deep-fried and topped with assorted, delicious fixings, including powdered sugar, caramel and chocolate syrups, chopped peanuts, whipped cream and banana split flavored ice cream bites then fittingly crowned with the traditional cherry. Served at the Auto Grill inside the Automobile Building. Winner of Most Creative in the Big Tex Choice Awards competition.
Deep Fried S’mores – Marshmallow cream and chocolate chips are sandwiched between two graham crackers, dipped in a feather-light batter and fried to a golden brown. The campfire-inspired treats are dusted in powdered sugar. Included in the menu at stand N9 located near the Embarcadero entrance. Finalist in the Big Tex Choice Awards competition.
Fire & Ice – A pineapple ring is battered and deep-fried, then topped with banana-flavored whipped cream that’s been frozen in liquid nitrogen. The smoking concoction is ladled with strawberries and syrup. Fire & Ice is served by Abel Gonzales at the family-run stand on Nimitz Drive. Finalist in the Big Tex Choice Awards competition.
Fried Pop Rocks Fundae Blast – Ignite your senses with this explosion of Tastes. Fried Ice Cream covered in Hershey’s Syrup and Pop Rocks. Your fuse is a Twizzler rolled in Pop Rocks. While you disarm it, you’ll find an Atomic Fireball inside . . .“Fire in the Bowl”! Stand FW-22 located on Fun Way across from Lost Children Building.
Fried Dinner Roll – A savory dinner roll lusciously filled with cream cheese and covered with a sweet batter, placed on a stick and deep fried to perfection. Stand TB-14 located in the Tower Building.
Green Bean Fries – Fresh Green Beans lightly battered, deep fried, and served with a side of cucumber ranch dressing for dipping! BW’s Fried Ribs stand TB-1 in the Tower Building.
Texas Bar-B-Que Eggrolls – BW’s Chopped Beef in an eggroll wrap, deep fried to a delicate crispness, and served with BBQ sauce for dipping or ignite your senses further with a splash of Sriracha Hot Chili Sauce. BW’s Fried Ribs stand TB-1 in the Tower Building.
Ignited Moon Pie - The Original Moon Pie, lightly battered and deep fried, then gently sprinkled with powdered sugar! Stand N-9 located near the Embarcardero Building entrance.
Not exactly something I’d shovel into my mouth, but this animation is some of the tastiest stuff I’ve seen in a while!
Believe it or not…
Delightfully charming Sloppy SPAMmich spiraled to defeat in this year’s annual SPAM Cook Off! This wondrous SPAM Cook Off can be found only in the heart of Fremont, Nebraska (and other prestigious U.S. locals selected primarily for their exquisitely refined palates).
The winner of said competition was none other than Spyros!
WTF!??!!! you ask. I know, you’re curious and a little confounded, but not to worry. I’ll share the award winning recipe with you. But first, you absolutely must meet someone…
[Enter Ms. Spammy-Dandy Denton]
aka Maven Spam’NoiNk
Okay, now what you’ve really been waiting for:
Shirelle loves gyros, so she decided to give this favorite a SPAM twist. She also substituted tortillas for the pita bread. The result was a flavorful, full of good-for-you vegetables, creamy-sauced sandwich that added zest to an old favorite. The judges loved it and deemed it worthy to enter in the national competition.
Spyros
by Shirelle Flores
1 can (12-ounce) 25% Low Sodium SPAM
1/2 cup finely chopped or shredded onion
2 teaspoons fresh minced garlic
1/2 teaspoon dried ground rosemary
1/2 teaspoon dried ground marjoram
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil
3 large burrito-style flour tortillas or authentic pita bread
Garnish:
1 head lettuce, shredded
4 ripe tomatoes, sliced
1 can (6 ounces) whole black olives
1 package feta cheese
1 large red onion, sliced
Cucumber Yogurt Mix:
1/2 cup shredded cucumbers
1 cup plain white yogurt
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1/4 teaspoon vinegarPrepare cucumber yogurt mix by combining all ingredients and then refrigerate to chill. In a shallow baking pan add the olive oil and all of the seasonings including the onion and garlic. Marinate 12 evenly sliced pieces of SPAM in the mixture for about 15 minutes. Bake at 350 degrees for about five to eight minutes or until SPAM is crispy around all edges and soft in the middle. While the SPAM slices are marinating, you should start preparing your garnish items such as slicing tomatoes and shredding lettuce. Warm your tortillas according to package directions. Take four slices of your baked SPAM and place on tortilla. Garnish with the lettuce, tomatoes, red onion, black olives and feta cheese. Add the cucumber yogurt mix on top. Fold the bottom of the tortilla up and wrap. Now enjoy your Spyro.
Alright.
Alright. Enough gastrointestinal mayhem for one night.
…
Perhaps they should’ve invited a few stakeholders to the table.
.
Full story by James Chapman via MailOnline
